My exercise was a mix of success and failure this month. On the beginning of the month it was going strong, and I was making good use of the gym equipment at school. Then I went on vacation and I havent done any exercise since I returned, telling myself it was OK to take a break from it. Instead of using that time to study, I spent the time loafing on the internet. O well, at least I’ll have a fresh start during the New Year.
- Have a closer relationship with God.
- Write more neatly. My hand writing is atrocious and I will not stand it any longer. I have to write slower and put more effort into it.
- Become a better man in general, Mentally, Physically and Spiritually.
- Get A’s on my As-Level IGCSE
- Loaf less and do my daily essentials such as reading and writing
- Improve Social Behavior
- BE MORE CLEAN
- Spend more time helping people
- Had fitness training after school= Exhausting
- Studied for my ICT exam= Frustrating
- Listened to Badbadnotgood= Relaxing
As we near the holidays, the amount of work at school is slowing down exponentially. This is bad however as my brain slowly leaks all the information I have learnt over the past few months.
Today is a return to habit. I read, I exercised and it just gave me the sense of structure that I feel I need in my life. But the last few days also told me that there is beauty outside of the structure. So rather than being a slave to routine I should use it as a guideline or a framework for my day.
Had ICT class as normal today. Was going to go out afterwards but had a massive headache.
I think the things I try to consume is reaching a critical mass. I am giving myself too much to do in one day. My to do list is becoming so long I need a do later list.
The problem lies in my inability to let something go. I always want to see everything something has to offer. I don’t want to miss anything. I will click on anything to make sure I’m not missing anything good. The stuff I can’t consume immediately I throw somewhere for later. It’s as if someone is forcing me to get the best out of everything. Download every free thing. See every picture. Check out every deal. It’s taking its toll and burning me out. I need to relax and slow it down and realize its OK to miss some stuff. It’s not the end of the world. I can always come back to it, and maybe then I can discover something I purposely missed and be delighted.
Joao showed me this after the movie. It’s so deep.
- Reading from front to back my issue of Reader’s Digest that I bought 3 months ago (weird, ain’t it?)
- Rather than starting a new habit, review the habits I know already in “The 7 Habits of a Highly Effective Teenager”
- Learn this rap, featuring a reanimated Hitler vs Darth Vader
“To see a world in a grain of sand
And a heaven in a wild flower,
Hold infinity in the palm of your hand,
And eternity in an hour.”
A view of the world
“A Person Becomes Old When His Mind Is More Occupied by Memories Than Aspirations”
I am sitting here on my bed of reading the second habit of “The seven habits of an effective teenager.” I feel so inspired, if not a little overwhelmed. It gave me a lot to think about. Who I am. What do I stand for. What do I want to be when I grow up. These are hard questions for me to answer. I can be inspired in one moment and then be completely shallow in the next. Of course I shouldn’t expect myself to be inspired and thoughtful all the time; it’s just not practical. But I forget where I’m going, where I want to go. I become numb to emotion and thought. I found a word in my readings that may perfectly describe my situation: apathy. The absence or suppression of emotions. I don’t think I do it purposely but I simply slip into it. Unaware of its numbing effects until I’m on the bed about to go to sleep. It’s as if I need to rediscover myself everyday. This must be ended. I am going to take small steps (because I often bite of more the. I can chew) to change my state of mind. A small evolution. My thoughts will no longer be drowned out by the mechinacations of the modern world.